Hardy Detective Agency featuring Hardy Boys Fan Fiction

Joe shifted gingerly, trying to find a position that inflicted the least pain to his body, but found that there wasn't one. The bouts of shivering that were racking his body were certainly not helping the cause.

"Here, man, take my jacket. What happened to yours?" Biff quickly draped his own jacket over the other's shaking shoulders.

"I got jumped by some guys. Took my jacket, wallet and phone. Slapped me around while they were at it too," Joe said in between shivers.

"Are you okay? Maybe I should take you to the hospital to get checked out," Biff asked anxiously.

Joe shook his head and immediately regretted the movement. "No, no hospitals, thank you. I just want to go home and crawl into bed."

"You sure?"

"Yes, I am sure," Joe said tiredly, closing his eyes. "Stop fussing. You sound almost as bad as Frank."

"Shouldn't we call the police about those guys? They took your wallet," Biff said.

"Probably not too much that the police can do. The bad buys are long gone by now. I'll report the missing wallet tomorrow. Man, my driver's license was in that wallet," Joe said miserably as he pulled Biff's jacket closer, trying hard not to let his teeth rattle as shivers continued to shake him. Some pathetic hero he turned out to be, Joe thought in disgust.

"Almost forgot, I better give Frank a call. He's probably freaking out by now and crashing through every red light to get here," Biff suddenly said as he flipped open his phone.

Joe opened his eyes and looked at him in confusion. "Why is Frank coming here? Come to think of it, why isn't he here? He said he was going to pick me up tonight."

Biff held up a hand as he began talking into his phone. "Frank? Joe's with me now. He's fine. No, really -- " Biff glanced over at Joe and held out his phone with a helpless shrug. "He's demanding to talk to you."

With a weary sigh, Joe reached for the phone. "Hi, big brother. Yes, I am fine. Really. What happened to you? I thought you were supposed to pick me up. Never mind. We will exchange stories once we get home. Yeah, see you later."

Biff glanced at Joe and let out a chuckle. "I think you are going to get a nice little interrogation tonight, by big brother Frank."

"Yeah, well, I have some questions for him too," Joe said, once more closing his eyes. "Where was he when I was freezing my butt off waiting for his ride?" Not to mention making a complete fool of myself trying to rescue some girl that obviously needed no rescuing. Well, perhaps it wasn't so obvious at the time. Hardy, you've got to be the biggest loser on this side of Bayport. He could almost hear Frank's lecturing voice, droning on and on. Think, little brother, think before you act. Yeah, well, maybe I just like to prove how right you can be sometimes, big brother.

"He and Callie went to the later show and he asked me if I could pick you up instead. Only I went to the Center to wait for you." Biff's voice jerked him quickly back to reality.

"I left a message for Frank telling him that I was at Jason's house and that he should go there instead to pick me up," Joe said.

"I guess Frank didn't get the message until he got out of the movie and by then I was already waiting for you at the Center. He did call me right away after he picked up your message," Biff explained. "Took me a while to find that apartment. When I finally got there, you weren't there so Frank asked me to drive around to see if you were wandering about trying to find your own way out of that maze." He glanced over at Joe and added, "I'm sure Frank's had a few anxiety attacks this evening already. Having your phone turned off certainly didn't help things tonight.

"Yeah, I forgot to charge my phone. Battery is dead," Joe admitted a little shamefacedly. "Big brother Frank is going to lecture me on that, again. And Mom too. Man, a lecture in stereo, one on each side of me. How lucky can I get? As if what happened tonight wasn't enough."

Biff gave him a quick look. "So, what happened tonight? I want all the gory details, Hardy."

Joe responded with silence.

"Hey, call it payment for chauffeuring you around tonight. The way I've been shuttling you about from place to place, you'd think my name is James," Biff said.

"All right, James, home," Joe said, grinning.

"Cough it up, Hardy. Like I said, I want all the gory details, every last one of them," Biff was not to be so easily deterred.

Joe let out a long breath. "I told you, I got jumped by some guys and they stripped me. At least they left me my shoes. And that was a brand new jacket, less than a month old. Mom and Dad got it for me for Christmas."

Biff threw him a suspicious look. "What, you were standing in the lobby of the apartment, patiently waiting for your ride and minding your own business and they jumped you? There's got to be more to it. And how does that Taylor guy fit into all this?"

Joe rolled his eyes, knowing that he would have to come up with some version of the truth. "Okay, but you better not laugh or I'll belt you one, I swear I will."

Biff grinned gleefully. "This is going to be better than I thought."

Joe shot him a venomous look. "You want to get punched now, or later?"

Biff instantly schooled his face. "Okay, the smile is off my face. Tell away."

Joe quickly gave a watered down version of what had happened. He slouched back against the car seat when he finished, feeling even more miserable now that he had verbalized the past hour's events.

"Well, that really sucked!" Biff said, rather angrily.

"What do you mean?" Joe looked at him in surprise.

"Those punks! If I ever run across them, I'll give them the Biff knuckle to nose special. And that screaming chick. I'll give her something to really scream about."

"You mean you don't think I'm an idiot for jumping into something like that?" Joe asked his friend.

Biff shook his head. "I probably would have done the same thing. I mean, a girl was screaming, for crying out loud. Any guy with a shred of decency would have jumped in to help. Who would have guessed that they were playing some sick game?"

"But I was warned to mind my own business in that place," Joe said morosely. "Should have listened."

Biff gave him an incredulous look. "You're kidding, right? You're Joe Hardy, for cripes' sakes! How can you hear a scream and do nothing? That's like asking you not to breathe. Besides, your reaction was totally natural in the circumstances. Like I said, I probably would have done the same thing myself."

Joe smiled gratefully. "Thanks, pal. I was feeling quite the idiot for a while there."

Biff slapped the steering wheel angrily. "Those punk scumbags! And people wonder why nobody stops to help anybody anymore. When you get slapped in the face like that, who would blame you if you don't stick out your neck for people anymore?"

Joe touched the tender lump on the side of his head. "I got slapped in the face all right, and my ribs, and my back."

"You're sure you okay?" Biff asked, his face tightening once more in a worrying frown.

"I will be, that is if I can survive what's waiting for me at home. At least Dad's out of town or else I will have his voice added to the upcoming lecture. Never mind stereo, I'd get it in surround sound," Joe said.

Biff gave him a sympathetic look. "Well, at least you are well experienced to face such an onslaught."

"Why does everything has to happen to me?" Joe groaned.

"Because you're Joe Hardy?" Biff offered helpfully.

"Drive, James."

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Disclaimer

The Hardy Boys belong to Simon and Schuster and the Stratemeyer Foundation. The Hardy Boys Fan Fiction authors of the Hardy Detective Agency have just borrowed them for an adventure or two. The authors promise to put the boys back when they are done with them. The authors do claim copyright to the original characters in this story. Please do not borrow original characters without express permission of the authors.