Hardy Detective Agency featuring Hardy Boys Fan Fiction

My name is Joe Hardy

“It was a cloudy morning. I remember looking at the sky when I was out surfing and willing the clouds to go away. Ness was coming to visit, and we had planned a day spent lazing on the beach with Frank and Callie.”

“As usual, I spent way too much time on the water and ended up running late, which meant a last minute shower, and of course, hal f way through the water stopped.”

”What the?...” exclaimed Joe, his hair a mass of shampoo suds.

‘I bet its Callie Shaw trying to bug me.’

“Prepare for a SOAKING, Ms Shaw!”

Joe marched into the living room fully expecting to see his brother’s girlfriend on the couch, laughing hysterically.

However the living room, and evidently the rest of the house were empty and silent.

Joe stood, listening intently, his mind switching to ‘detective mode.’ He moved quietly through the empty kitchen and opened the back door.

“I think I was being paranoid, but water doesn’t just stop, and anyhow, it goes with the territory. It just felt like something was wrong, but there seemed to be nothing outside except the black cat which had taken residence in our backyard. The n I saw the water pipe, or what was left of the water pipe. It looked like someone had hit it with a very large blunt object, and there were bits of plastic everywhere.”

“And then Callie walked in.”

“Joe Hardy, are you trying to give me heart attack, what are you doing, and why aren’t you dressed?”

Frank came running in when he heard his girlfriend’s shrieks, and at the sight of his brother kneeling at the back door clad only in a towel and with shampoo suds all around him, Frank dissolved into helpless laughter.

Joe frowned at them both, annoyed and irritated by the interruption to his shower and their mirth at his expense.

“I am MEANT to be at the airport but am running ridiculously late because someone, for whatever reason, decided to smash our main water pipe, so that water that’s meant to be in my hair is running down the lawn instead.”

He threw his hands in the air. “HOW am I meant to collect Ness looking like this, huh?”

Frank struggled to control his laughter. “Okay Joe, okay, look, rinse your hair out in the sink, you can use bottled water from the fridge and go collect Ness ; I’ll look at the pipe.”

He moved towards the back door as he spoke, and the expression on his face grew suddenly serious as he surveyed the damaged pipe…

“So in any case, I left five minutes later, with just 15 minutes to get across town. I decided to cut across town rather than taking the freeway and risk getting caught up in rush hour traffic.”

“It’s funny but from that point on, I only remember bits and pieces of what actually happened. I know that there was a Queen marathon on the radio and that I had Bohemian Rhapsody up full blast as I drove.”

“I also remember having to sit on the brakes at one point, when some kids kicked a football into the traffic by accident.”

“After that I just remember sitting at an intersection waiting for the lights to go green, one eye on the road and the other on the kids who were weaving dangerously through the traffic in pursuit of their ball. Next thing BAM! The re’s a Ford Explorer with its front bumper coming through my side door.”

“I was really mad at this stage, and got even angrier when the Explorer then reversed, and shot past me, ran a red light and disappeared into the distance.”

“ The re was nothing to do except call the cops, call Frank and get him to collect Ness, and then sit there and wait for the police to arrive, which they did a couple of minutes later. I remember thinking it was strange that there was just one officer in the car…"

“That was quick!” Joe Hardy smiled at the police officer standing at his window. The man kept his cap on and his head down, so that Joe could hardly hear him when he eventually spoke.

”License and registration?”

Joe fished the necessary documents out from the glove box and handed them to the police officer. “Listen,” he began, “ The y hit me and then took off, I was sitting in traffic…I…”

But he was interrupted. “What is your name?”

“Joe Hardy, my name is Joe Hardy, just like it says on my license, now are you going to he—”

But he never finished the sentence; a sharp, swift blow to the back of the head sent Joe Hardy into oblivion…

“No one took much notice of the police officer dragging the semi-conscious man into the back of the police car. I guess they thought I was another drunk. But I wasn’t drunk and he certainly wasn’t a police officer.”

“And that’s how it all began…”