HDA - Innocent by Red Chapter 12

There was stunned silence for a minute before Fenton and Frank both exploded.

"Absolutely not!" Fenton cried out.

"No!" Frank yelled. "He is not crazy!"

As Frank and his father continued their rather loud protest, Joe remained uncharacteristically silent; something that did not go unnoticed by Andrew. When the yelling finally died down, Andrew looked at Joe.

"Joe, your opinion is the most important of all and you haven't said a word. How do you feel about it?" he asked.

Frank stared at his younger brother, just now realizing he hadn't commented at all.

"Joe," he said softly. "You can't really be considering an insanity defense." Frank gripped his brother's arm tightly. "You are not crazy!"

Joe looked at him with haunted eyes, images from the dreams flashing through his mind.

"How do you know that?" Joe replied quietly.

Frank looked at his father, anger written all over his face. "We need to talk…now!" he growled and stormed out of the room.

"Excuse me." Fenton said, following Frank out of the room.

"Sorry." Joe said to Andrew, somewhat embarrassed at the outburst.

"For what, Joe? None of this is your fault. You were a victim of horrible circumstances."

"Thanks."

"I take it by your silence that you might be considering the temporary insanity defense?" Andrew prodded.

"Would it keep me out of prison?" Joe asked, answering Andrew's question with one of his own.

"A not guilty by reason of temporary insanity would. However, it would result in your being confined to a mental facility until the doctors deemed you were no longer a threat to yourself or society. And since we know you aren't, you would probably be out fairly quickly. Once you were discharged, you'd be free. No prison time."

"But I'd probably never work as a private investigator again, right? Or in any kind of law enforcement. Not with a documented history of mental illness." Joe said sadly.

"Probably not." Andrew concurred. "There is something else to consider. If do you go that route, you are essentially saying you did kill Chris Taylor, but you didn't realize what you were doing at the time. Are you absolutely sure you want to do that considering it's not true?"

Joe rested his head in his hands and thought of Vanessa. If Frank and his father couldn't find the evidence they needed to clear him, he would almost surely be convicted and receive a lengthy prison sentence, possibly a life sentence.

'I can't disappear from her life and leave her to try to cope with this alone. Not when it was all my fault to begin with.'

If he went with the temporary insanity defense, he would be admitting to a crime he did not commit and be institutionalized for a short period of time; but eventually they would be together again. Even though everyone, including Vanessa, had been telling Joe none of this was his fault, he still felt completely responsible for the mess Vanessa's life had become. Most people thought he was guilty anyway and what he did for a living after all this was over was irrelevant. Vanessa had to be his number one priority right now. But could he live with himself if he lied about killing Chris Taylor? Even to be with Vanessa? How would she react if he did that? She had been so supportive of him right from the start, believing in him without question when no one else did. He realized he would need to discuss this with her before deciding what to do.

"Do I have a little time to think about it? I'd really like to talk to Vanessa about it." Joe asked

"There's no need to make a decision on it today, Joe. It's just another option to consider. One that would keep you out of prison. But if Frank and your Dad can find enough evidence to prove your innocence, this is a moot point." Andrew reminded him.

Meanwhile, out in the hall, Frank was boiling over with anger at the entire situation his brother was in and took it out on his father.

"I don't care what Dr. Lange says, I don’t care what you think is best, I don't care about anyone but Joe and he truly believes he is losing his mind! Dad, you have to tell him those dreams are real!!" He yelled.

"Frank, please, keep your voice down." Fenton whispered harshly, looking at the stares of people walking by. "Don't you think I realize that? I just don't know if this is the best time to do it."

"When is?" Frank hissed at him. "When he really does have a mental breakdown?"

"We have no idea how he is going to react when he finds out. He may take it all in stride, he may get upset but cope with it well enough, or he may go off the deep end. If that happens, he may not be convicted but you can bet the 'insanity' won't be temporary. We could conceivably lose him forever - not physically but mentally." Fenton sighed deeply. "Do you really think I want to see Joe like this? I can't afford to take a chance and make the wrong decision. We really are playing with his mental stability here. How big a risk are you willing to take with your brother's mental health?"

Frank saw the pain in his father's eyes and immediately regretted his outburst. His father was just as concerned about Joe as he was. And he knew everything his father had said was true.

"Dad, we can't just sit by and let him think they are just dreams. If he knows he is remembering something from his past, at least he won't think he's crazy."

"Frank, you see how upset he is when he thinks they are just dreams. How do you think he'll react when he finds out he really did see all those things, while they were happening? Do you honestly think he'll just take it all in stride after a few therapy sessions?"

Frank stared at his father, completely at a loss for words.

"All I did was watch some videotapes of what they did to those children. I was in therapy for months, and I was an adult. Joe witnessed it as it was happening and he was only six years old at the time. It took me a long time to admit this to myself, and I know it's not what you want to hear, but when he remembers, it's going to be devastating…for all of us."

Frank sighed heavily and leaned against the wall, closing his eyes.

"Ok, so what do we do next?" he asked his father. Images of the flashbacks he had watched Joe suffer through played themselves across the darkness of his closed eyes. Those brief scenes haunted him so deeply he couldn't even fathom what Joe was going through.

"I'm going to call Chief Collig and see if he can arrange a search warrant for Taylor's apartment. If we're very lucky, the evidence we need will be right there." He said hopefully, pulling out his cell phone. "Everything that's happened in the past few weeks is more than anyone should be asked to deal with. This is more stress than Joe can handle and that's what's causing these dreams to come on so quickly. If we can eliminate some of the stress…well, he's still going to remember but maybe he'll be able to deal with it better."

Frank nodded, realizing his father’s assessment was right on the mark.

"Go in and tell Joe you're going to be leaving to start looking for evidence."

Frank tried to protest but Fenton stopped him.

"I know you want to be here to support Joe and I know he wants you here. But you’ll be doing him a lot more good if you can find that evidence and we can put this whole thing behind us."

Frank turned and went back into the conference room. Taking a seat next to Joe, he looked at his brother's face. No words were needed; Frank knew if he couldn't come up with the evidence to prove Joe was innocent, Joe was going to proceed with the temporary insanity defense in order to avoid prison.

'No way, baby brother. I'm not going to let you take the blame for something you didn't do.'

"Listen, Joe. You know I want to be here with you, but I need to start looking for evidence. I know it's out there somewhere and the sooner I find it, the sooner this whole thing will be over with."

Joe smiled at him, knowing how lucky he was to have a brother who cared so much about him.

"And if you need to talk, just call me, ok?"

"Ok." Joe replied.

Frank reached forward and hugged Joe tightly. "I love you, little brother." He whispered and quickly got up to leave.

Joe watched as Frank stopped and spoke briefly with their father before disappearing down the hall.

'I love you too, big brother.'

His father returned to the conference room, shutting the door behind him, and so began a long, draining afternoon of planning the details of Joe's defense.

By the time Joe pulled into the parking space below his apartment that evening, he was mentally exhausted. Between the dreams, lack of sleep, the thoughts of a prison sentence and the possibility of having to spend time in a mental facility he just wanted to grab Vanessa and run away, leaving all their problems behind.

As he got out of his car, he looked up and saw Vanessa curled up in a lounge chair on the balcony. The weather had once again turned unseasonably warm and he was glad to see her taking advantage of it. He knew she had been rattled by the articles in The Bayport Times and had not left the apartment today. He smiled and waved at her and was glad to see she returned both.

Making his way up the stairs, he entered the apartment where Andrea was waiting for him, with a look on her face that he did not like at all.

"What happened?" he asked, not knowing how much more he could take today.

Andrea shook her head. "She needs to tell you herself." She said simply, gathering up her things. Kissing him on the cheek, she left, hoping Vanessa would talk to Joe right away and get everything out in the open.

Joe walked to the sliding glass door and stood looking out at his fiancée, who was staring out at the early evening sky. Rubbing his eyes, Joe took a deep breath and stepped out onto the balcony.

"Hey, gorgeous." He smiled at Vanessa. Pulling her up, he sat down on the chair and gently pulled her onto his lap.

"Hi." She smiled, and kissed him softly.

It was obvious to Joe she had been crying and that something was bothering her. She leaned her head against his chest and he held her for a few minutes, silently stroking her hair.

"So do you want to talk about it?" He finally asked.

She sighed heavily and sat up so she could look at him.

"Krista called me today." She began.

"Mm-hmm." Joe responded, recognizing the name of Vanessa's supervisor from work.

"She wanted to know if I had any idea when I might be coming back to work."

Joe pushed a lock of hair off her shoulder. "Take as much time as you need, Baby. Don’t let them pressure you into going back if you're not ready."

“I can’t go back there, Joe. Ever. It’s the last place I was before…” She stopped and took a deep breath, determined not to cry again. It seemed like all she did anymore was cry and she was growing tired of it. “If I even think of walking through those doors, I just start to panic.”

Joe pulled her back in and held her against him, knowing what was coming next.

“I’m sorry, Joe. I told Krista I wouldn’t be coming back to work at all. I quit.”

“It’s ok, Baby. You don’t have to go back there.”

“I know we need both our paychecks to get by.”

“No, we don’t, Van. We can get by just fine on my salary.” Joe said reassuringly. “Don’t worry, Babe. We’ll be just fine.” Joe prayed his voice did not betray what he was really thinking.

‘Rent, two car payments, utilities, food, a honeymoon…if that even happens at all.’ Joe thought. ‘What else can possibly go wrong?'