"Callie?" Frank asked her, hesitantly.

"Hey," she said softly, forcing a smile. She hated herself for doing that. In all the years they’d been together, she’d never pretended to feel anything other than how she felt at the given moment. Now, she didn’t trust herself with her own emotions. "How are you?"

She was actually scared to sit down and talk to Frank. The past few days- yesterday especially- had been beyond her worst nightmare. She had been so worried about comforting Frank and praying for Joe that she had managed to force down all of the sickness she felt instinctively whenever she thought about Frank’s choice. Here though, alone with him, she found herself unable to meet his eyes. She wasn’t ready, and she knew that now wasn’t the time for her to be selfish. Joe was seriously injured, and Frank needed her to be there for him.

"Callie, I think we need to talk," he said, uncertainly. He didn’t know where to begin, but seeing Callie so obviously an emotional wreck wasn’t bearable for him, especially since he had caused it, intentionally or not.

He reached out and pulled her to him, trying not to register his surprise when Callie didn’t hold him back, but just patted his back instead. "It’ll be okay," she said gently to him.

"Will it?" he asked her in return, as she slowly pulled away from him.

"Well… yeah. I mean… I mean you should go and see Joe, Frank. He’s… he’s not well." She fought back the tears in her eyes. And it’s all my fault. "He needs you. Go to him. I…I think you should." Callie found herself stumbling over her words, trying to convince herself that she could stay strong through all of this. She honestly didn’t know if she could.

"Callie," Frank began gently, "I need to talk to you… about what happened. I need to know you understand."

"I understand," she said, unable to meet his eyes.

"I don’t think you do," Frank pleaded with her. "Please, Callie. I almost lost you once. My brother is fighting for his life. I… I need you now. I can’t lose you again." Frank felt his voice quiver as he thought of Joe, and his uncertain future at the moment with Callie.

Callie was unable to hide the tears in her eyes as she looked at Frank. "I’m right here, Frank. I’ll be with you the whole time. There’s no way I’d leave you with Joe in the hospital," Callie managed.

"And after that?" Frank asked, dreading the response.

"Frank… please. I… Don’t even think about anything other than Joe. I’m here, okay?"

"Callie," Frank replied, ignoring her. "Baby, I didn’t have a choice…"

Callie turned in the opposite direction, trying to stop her face from crumpling. " I know," she said quietly to him, randomly straightening the frames on the dresser to avoid making eye contact with him. And she DID know- SHE had told him to pick Joe; insisted, really. Logic told her Frank had no other choice. Her heart told her the opposite.

Frank watched his fiancée struggle to control her emotions, and he felt his own eyes fill with tears. Oh, God, what have I done? He asked himself, yet again.

Still, he HAD to try. "Callie, look at me, PLEASE. We need to get this out in the open now, before it’s too late.

Slowly Callie turned around, and wiped the tears from her eyes. "What do you want me to say?" she said at last, finally breaking down. She hated herself for not being strong when Frank needed her, but she couldn’t do it any longer. She sat on the bed, and looked up at him sorrowfully.

Frank sat next to her. "Tell me how you feel. You need to do this, Callie, and I need to hear it. I couldn’t live with myself if you didn’t understand." His own voice broke. "I can barely live with myself if you do understand."

"I… I’m sorry," she managed, and started crying softly. "You don’t need this now. Forget about me."

"No!" Frank demanded, going to comfort Callie, unable to see her in pain. She pulled away from him again, unable to allow herself to be comforted. "I’m sorry, Frank. I don’t want you to hate me," she sputtered, between sobs.

Frank was dumbfounded for a moment. "HATE you?! Baby, I love you more than anything," he finally managed to reply.

"Not more than Joe," she whispered. The minute she said it, she regretted it. "Oh, God, Frank! I didn’t mean that. I’m sorry."

"You did mean it!" Frank countered. "I knew you didn’t understand!"

Callie stood up. They had both gone too far to go back now. "Understand?! Frank, would you?!" she sobbed. "I KNOW you had to pick Joe. I TOLD you to do it. Joe would have DIED. I know all of this, okay?! But… but…"

"But what?!" Frank asked her, desperate to finally make things right.

"But it hurts like hell, okay?!" she said at last. "You would have left me to be … who knows what?! I… I don’t know what I want from you," she finished, her voice shaking.

"Callie," Frank whispered, his mind spinning.

Callie went on, tears streaming down her face. "In the last day or so, I’ve done nothing but think, Frank. I mean, you didn’t have another choice… or did you?! I… I finally figured out why you made the choice you did, though," she sobbed.

He looked up at her from the bed. "Why?" he asked her, feeling emotionally drained.

"Because deep down you blame me for what happened to Joe!" Callie was sobbing now, unable to control her emotions.

"What?!" Frank asked, stupefied. "That’s ridiculous!"

"No, it’s not," she went on, rubbing her forehead. "Don’t you think I blame MYSELF for what happened? God, Frank, it IS my fault. I can’t even blame you for blaming me."

"Oh, Callie. No…" Frank saw exactly what was happening.

"It IS!" Callie had to get this out, and she felt her heart breaking. "I submitted the pictures and the article. I let Joe go with me. I asked for his help." Callie was visibly shaking now. "I didn’t tell you about it. I didn’t even leave you a note!"

"You had no way of knowing…" Frank tried to cut her off, but she was almost hysterical.

"And then," Callie continued, inadvertently and painfully flashing back to the captivity that she and Joe had been in, "I... I wouldn’t do what he wanted." She couldn’t even bear to tell Frank about the kiss- it was too humiliating. "So… he… they…" She struggled to breathe. "…they took the video- I told you about that. And the men, they beat Joe up—bad. Then, they made me watch as he was… dragged…" Callie felt sick even thinking of it. "I’m sorry," she finished, her body wracking with sobs.

Frank went to Callie at once, and took her in his arms. Sitting her down on the floor next to him, he gently rocked her back and forth as he stroked her hair. "No, baby," he said softly to her. "Stop. You need to listen to me."

Eventually, Callie quieted down. And rested her head against Frank’s chest. She felt terrible, guilty, and heart-broken. But… she had been honest. No one could take that away from her.

"Callie," Frank began, slowly, as he gently tilted her face up towards his. He touched her cheek tenderly. "Callie, you have to understand two things. The first is that I really DIDN’T have a choice."

Callie tried to look away, but Frank wouldn’t let her. "No, Cal, listen. If Joe weren’t hurt as badly as he was, even if he was hurt a little, I would have chosen YOU. He’s stronger; he can take care of himself." He met her eyes, and prayed he could convince her- all he had was the truth. "But Joe was hurt - he is hurt." Frank’s eyes registered the pain he felt as he said the words, and Callie bit her lip, again feeling horribly that she had anything to do with this. "Cal, don’t you see? It wasn’t a choice of the person—a choice of the heart. It was literally a matter of life and death. And, if God forbid, you had been in the same position as Joe, it would have been you. It would be literally impossible to choose between the two people who matter most to me in the world. I’d rather die, myself, first."

"Frank, I’m so sorry," she choked out.

"Shhh," he murmured to her, gently placing a finger over her lips. "And the second thing is that you have to stop blaming yourself."

"It WAS my fault, Frank," she whispered.

"No, Callie, it wasn’t," he said firmly to her. "You had no way of knowing. I can’t even imagine what it was like for you while you were held there with Nash and Jenkins, or for Joe, either." Impulsively, he held her closer as the awful thoughts came rushing towards him. "But, baby," he went on, "IF you blame yourself, IF you think you’re responsible, then they win." He tried to hold back the anger from his voice. "After all they’ve done, Cal- tortured my brother, played mind games with you, made me- choose," his voice cracked on the last word, "The last thing they can do now is get away with it all. I promise you, Callie. I WILL make them pay for what they did."

Callie didn’t know what to say. She desperately wanted to believe Frank, but she didn’t know if she could. What would she do without her best friend?

"Do you believe me? Say you do." His voice held a note of pleading that Callie had never heard before.

When she didn’t respond, he hugged her closer. "Tell me you at least want to," he said, softly.

"I want to," she whispered.

Frank held back tears as he continued to hold Callie. I’ll get those bastards for doing this to Joe, and for trying to destroy the most precious relationship in my life. With a shudder, he could only pray that it wasn’t destroyed already.